Females

This is not scientific, and, therefore, likely to be flamed.

According to the Department of Approved Research, there are twelve kinds of females. This report is correct, undeniable and not subject to revision.

1. Females about whose heads constantly orbit several ceramic coffee cups.
2. Females who frequently wrap copper-niobium wires around legendary undead spirits.
3. Females who construct starships from the contents of the Fort Knox treasury.
4. Females who have been inducted into the Mystic Brotherhood of Urtz Xshashem P%n%rry $*##@#$!
5. Females who have recently been flung from a large catapult and will crash into the Stone of Spone within seconds.
6. Females who have slain the Witch-King of Zongmar at least once. And we're not talking video games here either.
7. Females who professionally register chromed kites with the Department of Approved Aviation.
8. Females who would unambiguously prefer a slow agonizing death at the stinger of the Doom Scorpion of Plung to spending a pleasant evening alone or with a few friends.
9. Females whose revenge upon Genghis Khan has been swift and invincible and involving at least 12,000 gallons of blood.
10. Females whose collection of butterscotch sculptures of famous classical symphonies is unarguably supreme in the entire universe.
11. Females whose brilliant use of farm equipment has prevented the Fimbulwinter.
12. Females currently dancing upon heaps of skulls for purposes of computer programming.
13. Females who have appeared in supporting roles in the immortal TV horror show, "The Brady Bunch".

ObQuiz: Which are you? No excuses are acceptable, including claims of not being female.